blessing moment

after a recent question
I have been thinking about blessings ..........
and wondering exactly what a blessing is or is supposed to be ..........

I often end my mails with "blessings!"
without really ever having stopped to figure out exactly what I am saying,
what I am wishing upon, or for, another person ............

I do not claim to have it figured out
but
I do know that when I am in a place of nothingness,
even momentarily,
a nothingness of external things (when in Haiti)
a nothingness of self (when ill)
it is much easier to see, hear, feel and touch God
not that God is ever absent
but I do believe that all our "stuff"
even our own strength,
whether it be physical or intellectual or material,
gets between us and the face of God
gets between us and the hand of God
gets between us and the voice of God ......

afterall, that is precisely why the fathers went into the desert

and so, at this point I am wondering if being blessed
is being aware of the breath of God on my face
being aware of His song in my soul

and with that now I am wondering
if all our material things
our knowledge
our physical abilities
are simply tests ...............
to see if we will rely upon all these things
if our seeing of them will cloud our seeing of God
if the noise of possessions
will drown out the Holy whisper

friendship for instance
is that not a blessing?
yet I cannot see it
cannot own it
nor buy it
although I must take care of it
take very good care of it

blessed are the poor in spirit .......