Saturday, December 30, 2006

risk moment

the time comes
when the risk it takes to remain tight in a bud
is more painful
than the risk it takes to blossom

Friday, December 29, 2006

year end moment

this year must die
to allow the birthing of the next

this year
has been full
a time of pregnant anticipation
an intensity of labor
the necessity of surrender

this year
has been one of enlargement
expansion of my family through marriage
expansion of my heart through the Hand of the Father

this year
brought a new intensity of Him
the searing fire of His very nearness
the brilliance of His person
the freedom to dance in the wind of His Spirit

this year
provided the opportunity
to step out of my boat of all that was comfortable
and walk solely on the sea of His Promises

this year
I heard again the horses
felt their strength
shook with their passion
was one with their urgency

this year
birthed a moment to trust
stand exposed in the light of Him
and allow the camouflage to fall

this year
I saw Him through the hands of friends
heard Him through the words of friends
watched Him through the lives of friends
felt Him through the arms of friends

this year
I found Him in the deepest valley
sang with him on the highest mountain
and waited for Him when I could not find the path

this year
I say again


my Shepherd
my Guide
my Friend
I feel Your heart beat as You carry me close to Your breast
and provide for my needs

Father God

You give me precious times of rest in the lush pastures
whose very greenness speak of life

You kindly lead me away from storms of the day
to the still waters where You revive my spirit

You faithfully guide me along the path of safety and truth
to bring honor and glory to Your Name


in Your gentle strength
take me by the hand through the deepness of the shadowy valley
and I am not afraid
Your might and authority bring me peace

I behold the table You prepare for me
this table that proclaims the promises of Your covering
I discern it even in the nearness of those who would bring me harm
and kneel so the cup of my life may spill over with the oil of Your Presence

Your promises, Lord God Almighty, will sustain me
and I will abide in Your sanctuary always

and what of this year being born
this year so near at hand

all I know is

the King is in the land

Thursday, December 28, 2006

Wednesday, December 27, 2006

open moment

2007 lies open before me
a huge unwalled garden
full of flowers
full of weeds

where will I enter this garden

how will I find my way

what will I have learned when I finally plumb its depths

if I follow a path already made
I will be following someone else's path

pregnant with words barely mature enough to be birthed
there is a knowing deep within
this is the year I am to tell my stories
without fear of touching the still damp soil
from which new life is born

Tuesday, December 26, 2006

separation moment

I was invited to sit at another's table
to gather around the turkey

and while the food was amazing
and abundant
it was the moments
of a particular conversation
that gripped my heart
and was my most treasured gift

sitting in our midst
was a 30 something young man

there was a moment
when the conversation
turned to the question of choices

and he shared
that at this stage of his life
he has chosen
to reject Christ

he gave some of his reasons for doing so
and that he knew
those who believe in Christ
think he will go to hell
while they think they will go to heaven

and he is deeply hurt
in the knowing
that some think of him this way

and it is this very thinking
that causes a separation
between him and these others

and he lives in the pain
of this separation

and I heard the heart of Almighty God
who also lives in the pain of this separation

and I felt the pain of Christ
who came
not to bridge this separation
but to fill it with Himself

because if you build a bridge across chasm
the chasm is still there
but if you fill it in .............

I did not wish to invade the carefully placed
broken glass topped boundaries
of this young man
these boundaries that loudly proclaimed
don't touch me

all I could do
was hug him in my heart

the unspoken question

can you love me
as I am
in the midst of my choices

lingered in the air
long after the conversation had shifted

and even today
fills my heart
it was a moment
I will never forget

Monday, December 25, 2006

a moment

was there a moment
known only to God
when all the stars held their breath
when the galaxies paused in their dance
for a fraction of a second
and the Word
who had called it all into being
went with all his love
into the womb of a young girl
and the universe started to breathe again
and the ancient harmonies resumed their song
and the angels clapped their hands for joy
greater power than we can imagine
as the Word knew the powerlessness
of the unborn child
still unformed
taking up almost no space
in the great ocean of amniotic fluid
slowly growing
as any human embryo grows
a head
slowly swimming into life
until the ocean in the womb
is no longer large enough
and it is time for birth
madeleine l'engle


Sunday, December 24, 2006

no room moment

while with some friends
I asked where they were meeting
wondering if we could join with them
for worship this morning .......
the response was
that they were meeting in a home
there would be no room ............
and so I too
found no room in the inn
this day

cradle moment

pondering the cradle
in the shadow of the cross
for a few years now I have been overwhelmed by
and caught in the wonder
of the FACT
that Almighty God
the I AM
took the huge risk of encasing all of who HE IS
into a tiny seed
the size of a pin head
and implanting Himself into the womb
of one of His creatures .........
all of God in this tiny seed .........
and then in the fullness of time
being born into vulnerability -
dependent upon a woman for food and nurturing,
dependent upon a man for protection and guidance -
seeking love and life
through the body and arms of those He created -
and if He was willing to take that risk
can we do anything less
than seek Him
through the love and arms
of those who surround us
take a moment
touch someone today
find the Christ who dwells within
and celebrate Him
be silent
be still
empty before your God
ask nothing
say nothing
let your God love you
that is all

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

rim moments

life constantly asks us to meet fear with love
not an easy thing to do

recently I spent the whole day talking about love
with people I love
little by little
we let each other peek into the caverns we live in
and try to climb out of

that experience led us to the rim of how we know the world
and ourselves
and each other

when at that rim
we can shy back down into what is familiar
but sometimes
like crabs crossing dunes
we find our way to the sea where all boundaries blur

whether we make it to the sea of each other
or shy back below the rim of what is familiar
often hinges on whether we follow love or fear

those who risk living beyond what rims them
discover that love will usher us beyond ourselves

the attempt to be with each other
and to truly behold each other is
at once
familiar and new
shattering and healing
and all-embracing

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

tuesday moment

may today there be peace within
may you trust God that you are exactly where you are meant to be
may you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith
may you use those gifts that you have received
and pass on the love that has been given to you
may you be content knowing you are a child of God
let this presence settle into your bones
and allow your soul the freedom to sing
and love
it is there for each and every one of us
Saint Therese of Lisieux

Monday, December 18, 2006

Bethlehem moments

deepen my longing
heighten my expectation
make pregnant my hope
I know that within my heart is a Bethlehem
a place where light shines with tender memories
a place where angelic voices sing loud and clear
a place of wonder and awe, delight and calm. …
God of December darkness and Christmas light
journey with me during these days
so that I may know and prize my Bethlehem moments

Sunday, December 17, 2006

finding moment

nothing within me this morning
wanted to seek my God
in a building
with walls
a roof
and a name on the door
and so I remained at home
the God who inhabits
the inner sanctuary of my soul
this afternoon
there is again
an intentional coming together
of the living stones
to share in fellowship
and food
we will celebrate
finding Christ in one another
and we will have church
we will be the church
we are the church
and we will be well fed
by the bread of His Presence
we will taste
and be nourished
by Him
the I AM

Saturday, December 16, 2006

Saturday moment

be silent
be still
empty before your God
ask nothing
say nothing
let your God love you
that is all

Thursday, December 07, 2006

pilgrimage moment

there is a craving in my heart
to be alone with God
in His immense silence

to be deep and high
in the mountain of His silence
this mountain that is covered
with the cloud of His mysterious Presence

it is God alone who calls me to this mountain

for in this silence

He has something to say

to climb this mountain
to the very top
where God abides
it is necessary to empty myself
before falling into His hands

before I can empty myself
I must look deep inside
and acknowledge
the words
the events
the emotions
of the past few days
and release each one

then arise
and start on this awesome pilgrimage

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

stranger moment

there is a growing deepening sense
of being a stranger
that where I really belong
is somewhere else

a hearing of a louder and louder voice
come away

and when I ask

the answer is always
with Me

there is a risk of following
into the unknown
and in this incredible vulnerability
a choosing
to make myself vulnerable
and walk in that vulnerability

and I recall the moment
when God told Moses
to throw down the one thing
he still held in his hand

nothing to offer
except my uselessness
and my choice to be with Him
the choice that no one but Him
is likely to put any value on

even when I have no stillness of my own
to bring to Him
I can be met by God
in His stillness

eventually that stillness
becomes part of me

Monday, December 04, 2006

Sunday moment

after a bit of a hiatus
there was once again
a gathering around the table

while lovely to have the house full
the table groaning under the weight of food
the front hall filled with dripping boots
the air saturated with the sounds of many voices

I was saddened
that in our midst
was a bleeding shepherd
recently bitten by his sheep

and I again wonder
about the big teeth of the sheep
why these teeth are so eager
to sink into the skin
of one called to lead them

I have been told
a shepherd
when he rests
lies across the opening into the pasture
to protect the sheep within
from those
dressed in sheep's clothing
who would enter
from without

the shepherd at my table yesterday
while protecting his sheep
was bitten
not from without
but from within the pasture

and so we ate
we cried
we laughed
we touched

fingers caressed guitar strings
and we worshiped

and we were quiet in the Presence of the King

and we ate some more
laughed some more
cried some more

and after midnight
when the last went home
I thought of the different shepherds
who have sat 'round my table
with fresh wounds
from the big teeth
of biting sheep

and I was sad
because I am a sheep
and the ability to bite
is in me too

but for a season
this tender bleeding shepherd
will be sheltered
in the tent of our friendship
and when the wounds have healed
I wonder
if he will ever enter another pasture
for this is not the first time
his blood has flowed
because of the big teeth
of the sheep of his pasture