simple moments

I ran
in the rain
and the wind
and the mud
until I could only sit down
vaguely aware of clinging to the nail scarred hand

early in the morning
in a cabin buried deep in the woods
I came out of hiding
and ran home
into the arms of Father

esse quam videri
to be rather than seem to be

what if I discover that I myself
am the enemy
who must be loved

the opinions of others
exert a subtle but controlling pressure
on the words I speak
and the words I stuff
the fear of ridicule
paralyzes
the enervating fear of our peers
can create an appalling mediocrity

I look at my life
and see how I have filled its emptiness with people
as a result
they have a stranglehold on me

it is necessary to wrestle with God
to find my identity

there is a simple sacredness to life
when I sink down
into the centre of my soul
grow still
listening to Abba's heart beat
while God holds me silently against His heart