Lazarus moment

for several years now I have had this rumbling in my spirit
about the death and resurrection of Lazarus
I study and study
ask questions
read
search out hidden truths

much has been learned
yet still I have been unable to move away from that passage

just yesterday
another piece was unraveled

Martha ran to Jesus with her
“where were you!” words

Mary waited until Jesus asked for her
but then
she greeted Him with exactly the same words

the same words
but so hugely different

the difference being these same words
came from 2 disparate hearts

Martha spoke words of accusation
Mary spoke words of wondering

but it is the next thing that happened
that is new to me

Jesus asked
“where have you buried him? – take me there”

their response was an expressed desire to shelter Jesus
from the stench of death

is there an area, a time, an event
that has caused something in me to flicker
even to die

and is Jesus asking me to take Him there
so that He can call forth life

have I not been willing to take Jesus
into that situation
thinking to shelter Him from the stench of it

is He now asking
to go with me
Hand in hand
to that very spot

so life can come forth