day thirty-three moment

"as you gaze upon the cross
and long for conformity to him
be not weary or fearful
because you cannot express in words
what you seek.
Ask him to plant the cross
in your heart.
Believe in him
the crucified and now living one
to dwell within you
and breathe his own mind there."
Andrew Murray

there are mysteries I will never fully understand
concerning the death of Jesus on the cross
all I can do is place my heart
at his feet

6 hours now have slowly crept by

his back raw meat
his face ghastly
bruised
mangled
rivulets of dried blood

with a huge struggle
he lifts himself

FATHER, INTO YOUR HANDS I COMMIT MY SPIRIT
Luke 23:46

all the air in his lungs exhaled
his body collapses
Jesus Christ bows his head
gives up his spirit
and is gone

from the father
he came into the world

to the father
he returns

demonstrating his complete control over his own destiny

even as his body was shrieking in pain
he cried out with strength and power and joy
offering his spirit back to the father
from whom he had come

my heart wept with him
and now I rejoice in his joy at going
to his father

I look at the cross
and see my own sins
stained with his life's blood.