Monday, April 10, 2006

suddenly moments

there is a suddenly of God
that can interrupt your life
cause eyes to open wider
and ears to hear with a raw acuteness

and yesterday
was a suddenly

from dawn to dusk

there was a suddenly
in the realization of where I was yesterday
and emotionally

worshiping God
Who is the Same
and Forever

surrounded by many familiar faces
singing many familiar words

and yet .............

there was such a huge difference
and it was very very painful
in the realization of an ending

there was a suddenly
in the hearing
someone I care for
describe himelf by what he presently is doing
in order to put food on the table

and I looked and looked
and wondered why what I still see
is not what he is saying

and there was a suddenly
in seeing and feeling the anger and dislike
in a woman where I had never seen it before

and the suddenly of the tears
at receiving the "where were you?" phone call

and the suddenly of arriving home
to find everyone else here
around the table
and realizing the depth of love
that I have to give
but also am able to receive

and then another phone call
this one to announce a sudden death
the husband of a friend
driving home
after church
and suddenly his heart stopped
while his hands were on the steering wheel

and yet another suddenly
in the middle of the night
while feeling the Hand of God
on my cheek
hearing His whisper
asking me to be awake with Him

and the sudden gushing of the tears
that even at this moment
will not stop

and even in the knowing
there is the need to pull it together
in order to serve well the one who is about to arrive
there is a sudden urge
to simply fall on my face
and be

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